The Regulators | Warhammer = Houston we have a problem!

Warhammer = Houston we have a problem!

Sunday, 28 December 2008 03:11 by Hawthorne

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Warhammer Online (Mythic/EA's disaster MMO) is headed for troubled waters.

As if the layoffs and appologies from the Development staff were not bad enough, it seems that the Warhammer marketing kiddies cant sell enough box copies so they have started an "Invite a friend" campaign. This is coming from the same game that has been out less than 6 months. The retention rate for WH has fallen off since day one and the bleeding does not seem to ending anytime soon. 

What's even more amazing is the complete lack of anything new or even good about the systems they produce, lets take a look at what the key features of this failurific MMO tout.

 Key Features

  • Based on Games Workshop’s popular Warhammer fantasy world. Dominated by force of arms and magic, this world provides a rich setting for hundreds of thousands of players to experience the epic nature of war and the glory of battle. (Maybe that was cool in 1978, but you guys are a little behind the times)
  • Join one of six Armies and fight for the Armies of Order (Dwarf, High Elf and Empire) or the Armies of Destruction (Greenskin, Dark Elf, or Chaos). Wage war across three unique battlefronts.  (Armies? Really? Nice use of words that mean nothing in game. Crap is "Nice" too, if you call it nice. But it is still crap)
  • The next generation Realm vs. Realm game system integrates both PvP combat and PvE quests on the same map in support of the greater war. (Next generation? What the hell does that mean? Just because you add quests doesnt mean its "the next generation", if anything thats a more crap.)
  • Engage in four levels of RvR combat (Lol,You mean stay at level 10? 20 and 30? before doing the same thing at 40? Who writes this shit?)
  • Skirmishes: Incidental PvP combat (Ok, whatever that means)
  • Battlefields: Objective-based battles in the game world (Because the world needs another rendition of Capture the "insert trinket here", very ground breaking indeed)
  • Scenarios: Instanced, point-based battles balanced with NPC Dogs of War (What?)
  • Campaigns: The invasion of enemy lands culminating in the ultimate battle - the Capital City Siege
  • Undertake a wide variety of PvE quest types related to an army’s ongoing war efforts, including the new Public Quest: a multi-staged, story-driven quest that benefits from the participation of all army members within a specific location.
  • Embark on an epic quest to complete the Tome of Knowledge and unlock Warhammer lore, detailed monster information, and major story plotlines.
  • A robust combat system introduces Player Tactics (earned powers you equip prior to battle) and Morale Skills (combat options that increase in power when the momentum of battle is in your favor).
  • Customizable armor and a visual guild system allow a player to make their character truly unique.

With compettion like WOW and the horrible PVP implementation in Warhammer, it seems just a matter of time before this project has gone the way of Tabula Rasa.  It's not like we did not see this coming. And if this is any indication of what MMO's have in store for the "community" then we are all doomed to horribad games that none of us care to play.

It would do the industry well to get over its own arrogance and take the hint: YOU ARE MAKING TERRIBLE GAMES WITH RULESETS THAT PLEASE FEW.

Hawthorne

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